Silence is Golden

How many times have we heard such a statement from a bitter partner during a break-up or argument?

I bet most of us have – and then some! 

But what if silence tells the same story? Most of the time, a break-up is bitter and both parties go head to head with statements, accusations and some colorful metaphors thrown in. However, when people say nothing and stay silent, the very same statement of “stay out of my life” is echoed with far more conviction.

Usually people require time to calm down and gather their thoughts and emotions. But when a relationship has gone stale over a period of time, there are people who no longer wish to argue their case and rather let the relationship dissolve into silence.

This can be the best policy especially when all has been said. Both partners point and accuse. The communication becomes fractured and the slightest raise of an eyebrow or wrong worded statement can set off another world war three. 

It has happened to myself. It is not nice.

Though on reflection I personally find that if two people are constantly at war, perhaps the best policy is to walk away and say nothing. The silence tells everything there is to know about the state of affairs. Both partners have said it all before, probably time and time again.

There is nothing left to say and too much water has passed under the bridge. Both parties do not believe in the other and no matter how many times you have discussed it, the same situation arises time and again. The love may remain, but the trust and belief in the other is no longer there.

The relationship becomes a power struggle. Both parties resent the other and point and accuse. 

Everyone is entitled to an opinion. But when too much has been said, people begin to feel worthless and no good for the other person in the relationship. It is almost like an emotional battering into submissive silence that finally occurs. 

The fact remains, both parties are usually to blame. As an old friend once said to me: For every action that takes place this creates a reaction from the other.

Of course a silent time can allow breathing room. But that is when both parties reflect and soon realise whether the relationship is worth saving or not. That is down to how much both parties love the other. If it stays silent for longer than you are comfortable with, move on. Your life still awaits you.

So after a while silence is a welcome relief to the arguing and awful statements both parties hurl at each other. No longer are words locked in battle over a telephone or face to face. Text messages and emails no longer flash up. 

Silence says a thousand words. And now its time to embrace the calm after the storm.