Published by Food and fellowship are not synonymous. There are those who would beg to differ with me. The definition of fellowship has to do with being together, interacting with each other. Food can be added to the fellowship, but food is not fellowship.
I Could Not Keep my Mouth Shut!
Some things began to transpire in my life that forced me to make some changes concerning my health. My nutrition was a major factor in these changes. I could not picture myself standing before the Lord explaining why I could not complete my destiny in the Kingdom. Would I be able to tell Him I could not keep my mouth shut?
When I began the serious journey of losing weight and feeling better I was surprised by some of the reactions from the body of Christ I have encountered.
There have been some people in my life that have been extremely supportive and encouraging as I began to make these necessary changes. I want to focus, however, on some things I have observed, not just concerning my journey but the journey of others as well.
Legal Drug of Choice
Food has been used in the church as the legal drug of choice. We see the help that alcoholics and drug addicts need. However, we do not readily see the help we need concerning the addiction to food.
I first saw the problem several years ago when I was still the pastor of a church. We used to have workshops every month. We always offered refreshments of some kind. Since these workshops were held in the morning it was not uncommon to have coffee and/or tea along with sweet rolls or muffins. I watched a woman who came regularly to our meetings. It seemed that she never shared in the refreshments. Out of curiosity I asked her if there was something I could get for her. Her response forever changed our workshops and the food we served.
She told me that she was a diabetic and there was nothing available for her to eat. From that moment we never had a workshop or meeting with food that did not include nutrition that fit most common needs. We made sure that among our sweets we provided fruit, vegetables, salads and whole grains. The irony was that when we did this we found people avoiding the sweets and going for the fruit, whole grain muffins with fruit in them and the salads. There were more people who desired the healthier food than we expected. The temptation to eat the sweets and higher caloric foods was as difficult to overcome as it would have been for an alcoholic to ignore an alcoholic beverage, had it been available.
Ridicule
I was at a meeting recently that involved a lot of food. There was a minister there who was trying to do the Jennie Craig diet. She had bought her own salad dressing and a smaller dish to eat out of. I heard someone make a comment to her about the size of her plate. It was meant to be funny, but I could tell from the woman’s reaction it was not funny to her. I watched her put her plate away and get the regular size plates, filling it up as everyone else was doing. I felt very bad for her. Instead of celebrating her efforts she was being ridiculed for her efforts.
Ironically, she will be ridiculed for her weight as well. I later saw this same minister at another meeting. After the service a meal was served for all of the participating ministers.
When I got to my seat a plate had already been prepared for me. This plate was piled so high and was so full you could not see the edges of the plate. When one of the servers came to see if I needed anything else I asked them if it would be any trouble for them to bring me a plate with only a piece of chicken and just a spoonful of green beans? The server was not rude, but she was obviously shocked at such a request. She inquired, ‘Are you sure that is all you want?’ Yes, that is all I want. So she brought it to me. The other minister who was trying to watch what she ate sat next to me with an overflowing plate as well. She did not say anything.
I’ve heard it said from different ministers that the body of Christ is the only army that marches on its belly. They are so right. It is almost next to impossible to have any form of relationship with anyone in the body of Christ that does not involve food as a major part of that relationship. There is not fellowship without eating. Just to sit and talk or have activities together that are not focused on food is unheard of.
I did not have an overwhelming social calendar before I began to watch what I ate. However, once it became known that I was careful about what I put in my body, those few invitations for social interaction went to zero.
I found that when you desire to eat healthy, you not only stick out like a sore thumb, but the people force you to stick out further and more prominently. People try to make your eating habits strange and the word “skinny” is not a term of endearment. It is one of criticism. To overcome alcohol, drugs and sexual addiction is a great accomplishment in the church. To overcome food addiction is not acceptable, however, in the church.
The statistics of Christians dying from diabetes and heart conditions is just as high as among non-Christians and non-church-goers. The same is true concerning cancer among Christians.
I do not have the desire to lecture anyone about their health and/or nutritional habits. I have just been surprised at the attitude from the church.
Food Police
Church functions always involve foods rich in calories laced with loads of cholesterols, sugars and fats. Every once in a while someone will think to include a vegetable or fruit tray; and even a tossed salad. If that is all you put on your plate, however, you will stick out as an oddball. You will be pointed out to the crowd by the food police. Now, no one will say anything if you pile your plate up high with all of the goodies, making sure to taste of everything. After all, if you do not taste everything, whoever bought the food will be hurt.
There is a young lady in our church who was small when I first met her. She lost more weight after I met her. I noticed how she ate. She is approximately a size 6. People in the church would call her skinny. They always had something derogatory to say about the way she ate. It got so bad that she would not eat at all at church functions. Whenever possible she would slip out or not show up when time to eat. The odd thing about it was that the people who criticized or made jokes about the way she ate were ALL overweight people, battling one problem or another, from high blood pressure to diabetes.
As this young lady and I began to talk I discovered that I had a secret she did not have and she had one I did not have. I knew all about proper nutrition and the right foods to eat. I had a problem with portions. She could control her portions, but did not always eat healthy. We began to put our thoughts together and were able to help each other. I noticed that she ate more frequently than I did, but smaller portions. As she changed WHAT she ate, she not only maintained her weight, but she had more energy.
She knew I was overweight, but she never did anything to make me think she was embarrassed to be around me because I was fat.
What is the Real Issue?
It seems like we, as the body of Christ, have hidden all of our control, fears and jealousies in the issue of food.
People that battle diabetes, heart problems, weight issues and other health concerns controlled or inhibited by food have a difficult time in the church. Most socials are not built with “special needs” in mind. Gluttony is the one sin we will not talk about and the one we actually provide for.
I realized after I began this journey I would get little support from fellow believers. I was excluded from anything that had to do with food. This meant that the fellowship I needed from my brothers and sisters would be limited to our time in the sanctuary of the church.
When we begin to fully understand what fellowship really means, there will not be that constant seeking of the unity of the body. If food can divide us we probably were not together to begin with.
