Getting It Together: Indifference to how people treat you
It is important for a Christian who puts a lot of weight on other people‘s opinion of them, to begin to view things from a Christian perspective. For this reason, most of the points made, will be based on Christian idea’s. There is a Biblical side and a psychological side, that go hand-in-hand. The psychology behind it is simple, but the suggestions made will be based on research from leading psychologists around the world. First we will look at the Biblical side, then the psychological side.
First, let’s take a look at the book of Philippians. This is more of a personal touch, because in order to overcome my anxiety/worry of everyday life, and what people thought of me, I would turn to Philippians, which reminds me that life could be much worst that it is. The entire book of Philippians is written by Paul, from prison, yet contains the word joy more than any other book of the Bible. How does this apply to the topic? Well, if you imagine what Paul was going through, and the fact that he was actually happy to be in prison for the Lord, then how could you possibly feel bad? With God on our side we have literally nothing to worry about! If you truly believe this, other people’s opinions about you will not affect you at all.
So is God really on your side? Notice how that constantly, Christ (while on the earth) would go to a deserted place, and pray (Matthew 14:23, Mark 1:35). No man had it together more than Jesus Christ. Christ went to God when He had burdens on Himself. He had more problems in His life than we can comprehend, yet while being spat upon and persecuted, and rejected by the very people he created and loved like his own little children, He was able to keep it together. How is this? He put his burdens onto God. Maybe it did upset Him, but He was doing the will of His father, and He knew that was all He could do. Notice also, Paul and Silas, in Acts 16:25. They were in prison after being beaten severely, and were up singing praises to the Lord, and praying. How is it that they were able exhibit such peace of mind, in such terrible conditions? They had the Lord on their side.
Now for a more psychological approach, along with a few suggestions. This is still Christian based, but that is not issue since I’d say that the best form of psychology, is psychology mixed with Christian morals.
First, I want you to ask yourself something. What is God’s plan for me? How do I use what God gave to me? Other people can say whatever they want to or about you, but that is on them. Insulting you or feeling contempt towards anything about you, is insulting and co tempting a unique creation of God Himself! You are exactly what God wants you to be, and anyone who feels the need to say anything against you, can take that up with God!
Now for another point. Naturally, there is a trap that many people fall into. People will get the impression that people talk about them much more than they actually do. I call this the “Imagined Audience.” This is where people probably only talk about us for about 10 minutes or so at one time, yet we feel as if they’ve talked about us for 2 hours. People do not usually talk about us as much as we think they do. I’m not sure why we were made that way but we were. To stress over what people think about us is almost feeble, considering they most likely don’t put much thought into us at all, or at least not as much as we think they do.
And now for a few simple suggestions. According to psychological research, it is easy to let negative emotions built up within us. These emotions can easily translate into outbursts of anger, or depression, or other negative occurrences. There are a couple of simple ways to relieve yourself of these negative emotions, which are quite possibly building up:
1. Keep a Journal. It has been found, that keeping a journal works very effectively in relieving stress. The stress is, in essence, released from your mind through the pen, and projected onto the paper. Because of this, a journal is an effective way to control negative emotion, by containing them within a book.
2. Meditate. In my experience people are generally skeptical about meditation, but it is a very useful tool. The traditional view of meditation is someone sitting in a dark room with candles all around humming to themselves. This is not what I’m recommending. Meditation can be done while jogging, or sitting in a recliner. The purpose behind meditation is to clear your mind, and to simply relax. Allow yourself to think relaxing thoughts, even imagine yourself in your favorite place in the world (like I imagine the beach). You would be surprised at how much this can keep you relaxed throughout the day.
The main idea of all of this is this; People can be very stressful, but there are proven methods for avoiding that stress, and keeping it together. Good luck and God bless.
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This article is great Kory, thanks for the sound advice.
And yet, none (not any) of the followers of the (imaginary) God are ever righteous enough so that he, in his love for them, would come down to visit them in the sight of humanity. And where upon all believers have been told that if they had even faith as big as a “pea” they would be able to say to a mountain “move here” and it would do so…but no Christian is able to fullfill the words of Christ (that man born from the actions of a supposedly holy sect using astrology and holy rituals to attempt to bring into the earth a holy being) that others would come and do greater things than he (was rumored to have done). And am I to believe that the characters full of flaw in the (un)holy bible are always better than modern men who have (unwisely) dedicated themselves to the (imaginary) God with more fire than men in the past…am I to believe not one of them is worthy? But I don’t. Something else is wrong and what that is, is the lie that religion has fostered upon a most gullible world. for when thought (Adam) merges with imagination (Eve) then the mind is no longer able to see the universe or reality as it normally is.
And YOU are a victim of those who have merged your thoughts with imagination from a child to a man….and who intend to have you contiue to do so.
Well done young man, I think that the two suggestions for stress relief are great ideas. I have not kept a journal but I can confirm that meditation is a great tool for stress relief and has other benefits as well.
This is great! I keep a journal and blog when I’m feeling stressed. Lately I’ve found that sometimes just sitting in a quiet place with no music, people, or any other noises around helps me to meditate and relax.