Published by The issue of sex and the Mormon Church is a little more complicated than that, however. The question is whether or not the church teachings to young people instill a healthy attitude towards sex in general. Another associated content producer wrote an article called “Sex and the Single Mormon” for those who want an overview of the doctrine of the church.
I do not know if there are any studies done on this and all the stories I have are anecdotal, but it seems many marriages have suffered because of the way the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints teaches children to think about the act of procreation. Certainly, the Ex-Mormon and Post Mormon forums are full of wives and sometimes husbands complaining about how their partner feels that the act of sex is dirty. The spouses complain about how their Mormon partner’s attitude affects their relationship, but it is unclear if this is a merely vocal fringe element or part of a much larger problem in Mormon culture.
In a religion where the women are encouraged to have as many children as possible, regardless of what personal ambition they might have, instilling in children the idea that sex outside of marriage is filth seems to contradict the goal of producing more young people to be raised in the Mormon faith. Rather than instilling in young people – both men and women – the idea that sex is dirty and unclean, it would instead be better to focus on the idea that the idea of procreation outside of marriage is sinful.
To be fair, the Mormon Church does not teach that sex inside of marriage is sinful, but by the time it becomes okay for young Mormons to procreate within the bonds of marriage, years of Sunday school lessons have taken their toll and it may be difficult for couples to engage in intimate relationships. Even worse, some people may hold off on marriage completely because they find the idea of being intimate with another person fearful.
A study on the how the Mormon church practices affect a couple’s and individual’s sex life would be ideal, but the most appropriate place to conduct such a study – Utah – would likely not be receptive to the idea. Even if the the Mormon outlook on sex is rather prudish and harmful to some individuals later, the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints is not interested in looking at itself critically. Sadly, if the church would be willing to look at what it is doing rather than assume it is right on all matters things could change for the better for many people in the church and Utah might lower its high rate of antidepressant usage.
Well, I think this is a good article, but seeing as how I am against any church teaching people that sex outside of marriage is wrong, I can’t very well agree with the statement, it just sounds like the mormon church has taken the other church’s ideas and pushed them to the fullest. I’m unsure of where the problem really began, but don’t want to get into an argument over religion.
I am a member of the LDS Church. I was never taught that Sex is dirty and wrong. I was always taught that Sex is something good and sacred and should only practiced within marrige. How come this teaching is wrong? Looking at how many sexual transmitted desises are around which could be stopped if everyone would have only sex once married and then only with their partner.
I guess when you grow up in the Church it sometimes depends how good the teachers are. Sometimes people do get wrong ideas because the teachers taught what THEY think and not what the TRUTH is. But you get that everywhere.
That some people will not even get married “because they find the idea of being intimate with another person fearful” is just wrong. Well maybe not but you can find that in the mormon church and outside. Actually marrige and families are at the center of our Church (right next besides Jesus and God of course)
I, like Stephan, am a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints and have been ever since I was baptized at eight years of age.
Before I discuss the issues I have with the article, I want to state that to be fair, you have to realize that the church doesn’t teach that sex is dirty and unclean. I have never taught that, I have never to my knowledge heard that. It is sinful, that’s it. It’s right up there behind shedding innocent blood and denying the Holy Ghost in the order of serious sins. I won’t go in to why here, but that’s the way it is.
There are a few problems I see with this article. The first is what the author believes is taught in the church. I have lived in many different states, attended many different wards and branches throughout my life, taught the gospel for two years and don’t ever remember getting taught that sex was dirty.
I would say that the author would need to do a little more actual fact finding and referencing where she gets her “facts” before posting something so erroneous like this on the web. That’s obviously another problem I find with the article, sloppy journalism.
Another problem with the premise of the article is that the author seems to believe that what the “church” teaches is what is actually learned by everyone. All members have scriptures. All members have the gift of the Holy Ghost. All members have the responsibility to learn the gospel for themselves. So, if someone seems to think they were taught that sex is dirty then that’s what they learned or remembered. That’s not necessarily what was taught. We should all know that many people can listen or see the same thing and come away with totally different ideas and things learned.
I don’t like it when people post or write articles/books/papers without backing up “findings” or “facts” with references. This seems to me to be one more anti-mormon writer with no backing and base to stand on. Be careful you don’t write like this in all of your publishing. You’ll never be taken seriously by any upstanding company, unless of course it’s the New York Times.
I agree with the LDS posters about the relatively benign teachings about sex, but I’d like to point something out regarding sexual attitudes:
“For the Strength of Youth” is a pamphlet given to adolescents who have reached puberty. Here’s a quote:
In God’s sight, sexual sins are extremely
serious because they defile the power God has given us to
create life. The prophet Alma taught that sexual sins are
more serious than any other sins except murder or deny-
ing the Holy Ghost (see Alma 39:5).
By using vocabulary like “defile,” and “more serious than any other sins,” I think the church does indeed paint a picture of sex that would lead to self-esteem problems among teenagers.
Personally, I always felt that the church (through my parents, teachers, leaders) sent me the message that my sexuality belonged to heavenly father, and that I had to stay pure so that I could “give” that “gift” to my husband. I was never empowered to possess my own sexuality, and that fact did become an issue for me as I became an adult and experienced sexual intimacy.
Let’s just say that for those of us who don’t stay in the church, that’s a hard lesson to un-learn. I can see how it serves members and their families, but it doesn’t do much for closing the gap between LDS culture and the rest of the world we suddenly find ourselves in after we lose our testimonies.
I agree with many of the LDS posters. I also am a lifelong member and I believe that my marriage is much stronger because of our following the guidelines of the church. Besides the psychological ones, we also don’t worry about STDs. We teach our children the same principles, but not just the how, the why. I think it is also interesting that the church encourages PARENTS to teach their children these principles and NOT to depend on thee church’s sunday school and other programs. Most of the problems with our society is that parents are not involved enough in the rearing of their children but leave it to society.
I too am LDS and agree with the above posters.
At no time have I ever been taught that sex is dirty. Instead, I was taught chastity because intercourse is a special act between a husband and wife, and it is a sin to engage in sexual acts under any other conditions. Does every other major religion not teach the same basic principle? LDS just actually implement/practice what they believe and teach.
I am curious, what exactly do you think would constitute teaching young people a “healthy attitude towards sex in general?” Abstinence before marriage is the only healthy way to teach young people about sex. Otherwise, sex can produce illicit behavior and impulses, STDs, pregnancy, etc..
As to the supposed stories about this couple or that one having sexual difficulties, that is not because of what the church teaches. No more than you can say that a priest that sexually molested a boy in his congregation did so because of Catholic beliefs.
“””””In a religion where the women are encouraged to have as many children as possible, regardless of what personal ambition they might have, instilling in children the idea that sex outside of marriage is filth seems to contradict the goal of producing more young people to be raised in the Mormon faith.””””””””” – The LDS church does not tell any of it’s members how many children to have. There is not any contradiction. It is quite clear that families are not made from kids making kids. Instead, families are made by married mature adults making children.
”””Sadly, if the church would be willing to look at what it is doing rather than assume it is right on all matters things could change for the better for many people in the church and Utah might lower its high rate of antidepressant usage.”””””””’- What on earth are you talking about? What study do you have that has identified how many people in Utah take antidepressants…..much less how many LDS take them? If you really want to be concerned with getting people off of a medication, then promote abstinence instead of degrading it. Then maybe you can decrease the people on medications for Syphilis, Gonorrhea, genital warts, Chlamydia, AIDS, the morning after pill, infections after abortions, etc..
What is sad… is people like you who so wish to justify premarital sex, that they condemn anyone who calls a spade a spade. Get your head out of the sand hole; telling someone not to have sex before marriage, but then glorifying it as “not dirty” “not sinful” “not physically and morally damning” is hypocrisy at it’s best!
we have a debate can you tell me some reasons that we should agree too to premarital sex.. thanks..