Published by I have been a care giver for my husband for six years now. Dale had a stroke and has diabetes neuropathy which left him bed ridden and completely dependent on me. I take good care of him but sometimes, It is very trying. I think God is using this time to draw me closer to him and to teach me to trust him more. All along the way he has been there for us and answered so many prayers. But many a time I have laid in my bed at night crying and asking GOD why and begging him for the answer. Then praising, and thanking GOD for the good and the trouble he has allowed in our lives. This was one of those nights. I was talking to GOD out loud and the words I heard myself saying was so beautiful til I grabbed a pen and paper and wrote It all down. Here It Is: How many times must I give In to these moments of despair and sink deeper into my own little world of my own thoughts and belittlement of myself. To fight such a war within is such a struggle. but don’t let it win. We must be stronger than the warfare of this life, for we know that is what it is all about here in this temporary housing we dwell In. Take up your sword and shield. Here is another battle to fight and another war to begin.
Can I just sit down for a little while? Maybe under this big oak tree and rest my soul. To feel the cool breeze on my shoulders and maybe lay my burdens down. To feel your peace and safety and your comforting arms around me…Oh What JOY!!! just to sink right down into your love. So deep and different than any love I Feel anywhere else. You invited me In when I was young . Now I am old and my love for you is even stronger than then. You have showed your love so strong to me, now let me return my love to you. I want to hold your hand as you lead me through the valleys and even the mountain tops. For I never walk alone your always with me. You give me encouragement to go on. Even to walk another mile and when I slip and fall your always there to pick me up and say. You can make It! For I have equipped you for this journey.Shoes for your feet, breast plate and sword for battle, faith, trust and hope, as your strength.
I once was young. now I am old and as I look back I see your foot prints all along the way. where you were always there for me and as you bring me through the rest of my days on this earth. It is my privilege to serve you LORD the best I know how. Til you have completed your purpose In me and I know my life wasn’t in vain. but to touch the lives of others. So they might have a taste of your love and be drawn into your everlasting life.
Thank you Jean for such an insightful moment you have shared with others. I pray that our wonderful Lord will continue to be with you and minister to your every need.
It has been a blessing to read your comments and to somewhat understand your life as it is now. Don’t give up on the Lord, you already know He is right there in those dark times to encourage and lift you up.
We will continue to keep you in our thoughts and especially in our prayers.
Ernest and Ruth Oliver
very inspiring