Perspective: Theology

I have been walking with God for some time.  There was once a point when I realized, God keeps taking things from me without asking.  Then, my thoughts began to dwell at original sin.  Of course, like with any hardened heart… the mercy of the Lord just appeared; as naturally as I can just open my eyes and see light.  His mercy is always there, as it is said.

Although, there was a problem.  I considered myself to have a personal relationship with God.  A relationship based on faith which is righteousness, not simply justified as righteousness.  I cried out, Why do you not ask me for sacrifice!  So, the word arrived and asked for sacrifice.  Of course, the things which were asked were things which I could not possibly do.  Throw away your backpack (I am a homeless man).  Burn everything you have (all the things I had created in the countenance of the Lord).  The command of the Lord arrived, although always followed by the mercy which would harden my heart against his command.  So I learned, the command of God is his will.

Having learned, what have I discovered?  I am a failure to my Father in Heaven.  I am not capable to do his command because I have set a vision before me to accomplish.  I choose things daily, which are not God-like.  I buy my own food, and I refuse to beg for alms.  I work, and I strive to continue working.  I am weak and always use the spirit as an excuse to live as the spirit allows, in the stead of as the Father has commanded.

Although, where can I find a scriptural precedent to justify my actions; certainly not in Christ.  Only in Avraham, for Avraham was commanded to give his son as a sacrifice… although the angel of the Lord arrived and demanded differently.  Christ had the will to oppose the will of the Father, for He prayed on the rock.  Although, because I use a unique aspect of wisdom… I have no will to oppose the Father.  I am merely a wind, cutting around every instance.  I am not an everlasting spring, flowing through every way.

I try to view toward Christ, and find my place in He; to justify myself before our Father.  Although, the only justification I can find is command.  Christ witnessed at one point, saying.  The children of the kingdom exist like the wind.  Therefore I know, birth is far more painful than being.  Being, one may be as one has been.  Abirthing, one may only be as one wills to have been.

Yahweh had kept insisting.  I take from you because you are accounted as Job before me, all that you have done is pleasing to my sight and is immediately taken up to heaven (I have set you ablaze)… for you to complete with me.  Although I would argue ceaselessly, if you desire anything at all… just ask for it.  Although, I suppose he simply desires it to be easy on me; because I put my soul into everything I do.