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This is a quick story about hope and how God can take a poor, lazy, selfish and self centered boy from Jackson, Tennessee and mold into His creation.
I can look back in my life and see so many places and times where Jesus came to me. In the book of John, Jesus tells Peter that he would deny him three differenet times in the same night. Looking back, how many times did I deny Jesus? Jesus was so far from my mind throughout my childhood up through mid twenties. As a child I was concerned about playing and dreaming of becoming a professional wrestler when I grew up. By the time I became a teenager, my thoughts and focus went to girls, drinking and still dreaming of becoming a professional wrestler. I do remember through my childhood people that would come through our neighborhood on Saturday’s to invite us to church. Some Sundays we went to get the free pizza, drink or coloring books. As a teenager I went for the girls. Of all the times I was in the God’s house, I can honestly say I never saw Him. He was alway there but I never looked in His direction. I guess it is kind of like going to a crowded party and not paying attention to the people on the other side of the room.
August 17, 1990 and at the age of eighteen, I quit dreaming and started professional wrestling. Between that and my job, I only had room for me. Whether I was making someone hate me at a show or making a sell at my job, it was alway and only about me. Even in my dating life, it was always about me. At the age of twenty-two, I had an oppurtunity to go to Los Angeles, California. I was single, had money, and a company expense account. Can you guess what I was doing? Anything I wanted. I came home to Jackson, Tennessee in November, 1995. With the life I was living out there, when I came home I was definitely ready for rehab. Who knew my intervention was seven days away.
After being home exactly seven days, I was on my way home. While sitting at a red light with a van in front of me I was struck from behind repeatedly. When the van stopped moving, I checked on my mother and then stepped out. I could see the car behind me and the driver unconscious. I went to his car to open the door but it was jammed shut. The one question I will never know the answer to is what would I have done. I was confused and angry, mostly angry because my mother was with me. While being checked out by the emt’s, the police officer came to get my statement. The driver was drunk and had passed out just before impact. It was his eighth offense. Ironically, he had only been pulled over twice. The officer went on to tell me how lucky I am. He said that the majority of the time, it is the victims not the drunk drivers who are injured or killed. He went on to tell me “I don’t know what you are supposed to do, but it must be special because you should not be here right now”.
I went in search to find out why I was saved. I went into a church on a Wednesday night. As soon as I walked through the door, I felt different. Looking back, I believe that I walked through the body of Christ himself. Within a year, I had preached a couple of times, helped teach vacation bible school and was preparing for a mission trip to Poland. Around this same time, I met a woman. I thought she was it for me. She was in my plans but we as a couple were not in God’s plan. I back slid out of church and away from God. We gave birth to our son and conceived a daughter out of marriage. We exsisted five gruelling years, not counting the time of our divorce. I divorce lasted three years because I was trying to gain custody of my children.
Jumping ahead about to 2009. My life was in turmoil. I had a career, money and a great relationship with my kids. Although I have learned that when you take credit for God’s work, he takes it away. I left the stability of employment and steady income to start a business. The week following, My children and I started attending church in Dyersburg, Tennessee and have been there since.
This time with God feels so much different. Looking back when I first started serving God, I was still serving me first. Now I know that God is first in my life. I have seen my children develop friends at our church as well as see Emi, my daughter be baptized or as she calls it “bapitized”. Things are not perfect, many ways not even good. But I get up everyday and thank God for calling me to his will and ministry.
I hope this makes since to someone. Please don’t think this is another story about “ME”. This is a story that gives hope. Please know that it does not matter how many times God has called and you did not answer. What matters is that you answered. Just as Matthew, Mark, Luke and John each person has a story to tell about the miracles that Jesus performed, the times He healed and how he has worked in each of our lives. There is not a greater love than that of God. John 8:12
