The Mark of a Great Father: SC Governor Mark Stanford

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The mark of a Great Father begins at the point of leaving and cleaving. However, before leaving home one needs to know what to look for in a mate. Marriage is, without a doubt, a wonderful institution ordained by God (Genesis 2:18-25). So Christian homes can, and should testify and model before the unbelieving world, the beauty of a healthy, Christ-centered, marriage. 

So one needs to make sure before getting married that we have made a wise choice in our future spouse, one who is truly going to honor and uphold the sanctity of their marriage vows. If a young lady is loose (as they use to use that word) or brags about how many partners they have had. Would she make a good mate? All of those men will not just disappear from her life, and it will be something that will challenge one’s marriage. Anyone that tries to break up a marriage, whether they are happy in their marriage or not should be viewed as an enemy. Jesus said, “whatsoever God has joined together let no man put to sunder.” (Matthew 9:6)

Unfortunately, many Christians give more thought in burying a car or a home. Nevertheless,  apply the same amount of examination before marrying their future spouse – one, who in the end, is going to have a far greater impact (whether positive or damaging) upon their lives. 

Our homes need to change, and those of us who are Christians need to lead the way. We need to raise our children to be the kind of fathers and mothers God wants. If you think those things that God hate is funny, and allow anything into your homes, then you are not bringing up your children “in the nurture and admonition of the Lord.” (Eph. 6:4)

If a father love his family the way God expects him to, he will set his home on a course, that is in alignment with the word of God. Therefore, he will not only be a Christian, but a faithful Christian. He will be guided by the word of God, and not by his parents. Now, some parents today are involved in breaking up homes instead of trying to keep them together. “I told you not to marry that no good country girl.” Imagine that! 

Again, leave and cleave! 

Eph. 5:21 “Submitting yourselves one to another in the fear of God. 22 Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord. 23 For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body. 24 Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in every thing. 25 Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it; 26 That he might sanctify and cleanse it with the washing of water by the word, 27 That he might present it to himself a glorious church, not having spot, or wrinkle, or any such thing; but that it should be holy and without blemish. 28 So ought men to love their wives as their own bodies. He that loveth his wife loveth himself. 29 For no man ever yet hated his own flesh; but nourisheth and cherisheth it, even as the Lord the church: 30 For we are members of his body, of his flesh, and of his bones. 31 For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and shall be joined unto his wife, and they two shall be one flesh.” Clearly these passages of scriptures describes for us the identifying Marks of a Great Father. Not only are fathers commanded to submit himself to his wife, love their wives as he loves his own flesh, nourish and cherish it. But he is to teach his children the same. By the way nourish and cherish in verse 29 are a constant or continuing action. Unlike some men who start out opening the doors and all of the sweet things they do to get them, and then after marriage; “come on you slowpoke.” 

1 Pet. 3:7  Listen, in order for one to have the Mark of a Great Father he needs to be educated, educated in not only what his role should be as a husband, but what role his wife should play as well. Not doing so can cause the husband to be separated from God.

1 Pet. 3:7 “Likewise, ye husbands, dwell with them according to knowledge, giving honour unto the wife, as unto the weaker vessel, and as being heirs together of the grace of life; that your prayers be not hindered. Again, he has to make sure that his children know what God expects as they grow so when they depart, when they leave, they will be ready to cleave.”

Colossians 3:19 “Husbands, love your wives and do not be embittered against them.” (Do not be harsh with them. Do not treat them harshly.) The Mark of a Great Father will be clearly seen in the home and as well as in the community. Children must see this throughout their lives as they grow in the home. When a man is abusive and bitter to a young lady before marriage, shouldn’t one expect the same if they get married? This also illustrates to us our relationship with Christ as well, as with those who may want to persecute us. Jesus talked about the Mill stone and neck and then into the sea. (Matthew 18:6) Again, the husband prayer will be hindered if he does not treat his wife as God has instructed. (1 Peter 3:7)

1 Tim. 3:1 For men who seek to have the mark of a great father, they will seek to pattern their lives at after the qualification for those who desire the office of a elder, which is used interchangeable with bishop, overseer, and pastors. 1 Tim. 3:1 “This is a true saying, If a man desire the office of a bishop, he desireth a good work. 2 A bishop then must be blameless, the husband of one wife, vigilant (observant), sober (sensible), of good behaviour, given to hospitality, apt to teach; 3 Not given to wine, no striker (not a violent person), not greedy of filthy lucre (money gained dishonestly); but patient, not a brawler, (to fight) not covetous; (not a lover of money or such like) 4 One that ruleth well his own house, having his children in subjection with all gravity; (His children should respectfully obey him.) 5 (For if a man know not how to rule his own house, how shall he take care of the church of God?) 6 Not a novice, (new Christian) lest being lifted up with pride he fall into the condemnation of the devil. 7 Moreover, he must have a good report of them which are without; lest he fall into reproach (shame or disgrace) and the snare of the devil.” To many homes are on autopilot, because the husbands are not functioning as the way God intended for them to function in the homes. Therefore, that which goes on in the homes will also go on in the churches. I know it is not politically correct to say to the American people today; “ that fathers, must perform their duties as God has so ordained them to, in his word, the book, the bible.”

So the bible teaches that the husband has the final authority in the home. How he practices this are the mark of a great man, a great father, a great husband and a good Christian. He should never view his position of responsibility as master and slave, or dictator and subject. Rather, the book, the bible teaches that he views his wife as a part of his body. Certainly, the good father views his children as a part of himself. So, fathers, in the place as head of the family, into whose hands the control has been placed, consider those members of his family as partners.

The responsibility of control that God gives to the father should lead the committed Christian father to softly and thoughtfully direct his family in the direction that will best aid every member of the family. He will supervise, not only the physical supplies of the family, such as food, clothing and housing, but also will see that their needs for spiritual teaching and leadership are met. Some fathers have tried to split the obligation of leadership into classifications. Occasionally, they will say to their wives, you be responsible for the house and children, and I will make the living. This may sound good. However, it is not a Scriptural principle. The father has the position of authority and accountability in the entire family situation. Accountability matches the authority given and goes on after having finished the day’s activities as the husband and father lovingly guides the family in the right ways of the Lord.

Governor Mark Stanford appears to be sincere, and therefore, he should be forgiven. Hopefully, the Governor will bring forth the evidence of true repentance.