The Slippery Slope of Doubt vs. the Healing Power of Hope

I wanted to share a few tidbits that may assist those who have lingering and sometimes cancerous doubts about their relationships or the truthfulness therein

“The heart is more treacherous than anything else and is desperate.”- Jeremiah 17:9.

There are times when what we lead ourselves to believe is in fact a self imposed form of treachery or deceit. The comic above attest to that.↑

In these days and times, especially with so many technological and psychoanalytical advances many would take a clinical approach to ascertaining  there are structural integrity issues with their relationship.

However, before you take a barefoot walk down the slippery slope of hidden cameras, lie detectors, psychics, Maury Povich, and the TV show cheaters try this; Use good reason and sound judgement. Don’t allow the gremlin of viral suspicion to create mistrust where there wasn’t any in the 1st place. You will respect yourself less in the long run.

Whenever possible treat others with dignity and respect; even if they do not reciprocate. I struggle with this myself, but I KNOW it is good advice and I make a fervent attempt to follow through not for the sake of others, but for my sake and for how I view myself at the end of day.

A friend of mine and neighbor who is a Private investigator once told me this bit of sage wisdom. If you feel your mate (male or female) is lying to you constantly or is cheating on you then the real problem is trust of your intuition; not of the individual. Usually the root problem is one of 2 things: Projection (maybe you are the one who doesn’t deserve trust and you are projecting this onto your lover), or your mate has either given you the impression he/she is dishonest, or in fact is dishonest.

Perception does NOT always equal Reality.

My experience has been that time tells all. This requires a number of qualities:

• Endurance
• Patience
• Love
• Diligence
• Hope

1 Corinthians 14:4-7 reads:

 4 Love is long-suffering and kind. Love is not jealous, it does not brag, does not get puffed up, 5 does not behave indecently, does not look for its own interests, does not become provoked. It does not keep account of the injury. 6 It does not rejoice over unrighteousness, but rejoices with the truth. 7 It bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.

 In the interim, try counseling and killing your lover with kindness. In bible terms this is called “heaping fiery coals upon their head”; or turning the other cheek. Put the burden squarely upon their shoulders; don’t give them any reason to scapegoat you or use you as excuse for why they are behaving badly if they indeed are.

 Take the high road. If you are right about the person, then you will have the ability to hold your head up high and if choose to end the relationship, be able to do so with dignity, self-respect and peace of mind.

 If you are wrong, best believe your efforts will impress your mate and no doubt have some bearing on the reparations made to the relationship. If your  mate is a decent person, their love for you will grow and so will their respect for you.

 My wise grandmother before she passed once told me that “if you find yourself looking for the bad in someone or in life, you will inevitably find it. The good news is”, she would say, ”the same is usually true of the good”.