I once embraced a traditional theology, but after a time of disillusion, I came to doubt. There is no wonder that doubt crept in, since the literalist view tends to anthropomorphize God, seeking to make people believe the unbelievable. So I reached a point in my life, where observable reality and the set of beliefs being fed to me, were in total conflict. It wasn’t that I chose to not believe, it was simply that I could not believe what they expected of me. I learned the extent to which so many of the tenants of modern belief systems “borrowed” concepts from the much older, now dead mythologies of the ancients. These ancient mythologies were not intended to be taken literally, so how could I be expected to believe these same concepts now presented as if they were literal. Simply put, taking mythology literally contradicts observable reality. And a faith in concepts that clearly contradict observable reality is an unreasonable faith. It is not my failure that I can not hold such a faith, it is the failure of those religious institutions seeking to peddle such unbelievable absurdities. In my state of disillusionment, I took that ultimate step into Atheism. I remained there throughout many years of my young adulthood.
An Amazing Catharsis
After a number of years as a pure Atheist, who approached a view of reality, based fully on empirical science, I reached a day when I had an amazing catharsis. That catharsis set me on a new path away from Atheism, yet not back to where I started. I spent a while intently studying a chart of the Universe mapped out by the National Geographic Society. This poster-sized chart showed the overall structure of the known Cosmos as then understood by astronomical science. On the largest scale we see a Universe composed of countless galaxies, each with hundreds of billions of stars. These galaxies seem to form in clusters, which in turn bunch together into super clusters. There are vast areas of great seemingly empty space between these super clusters, yet they are still interconnected to one another by sometimes tenuous strands of further galactic clusters. As I allowed the vision of this structure to flow through my mind and considered it stretching into virtual infinity, I suddenly saw the curious similarity of the super clusters to our brain cells, and the interconnecting strands to synapses of the brain bridging the neurons of our minds. Except I thought, the complexity of this cosmic structure is on an infinitely greater scale.
The Universe is a Being
It was then that I realized, the Universe is a being. In a manner of speaking the entire Cosmos is the body or the brain, if you will, of a massive being. Consequently all of the much smaller sentient beings made of the stuff of this Universe are but pieces of this massive being that have become aware of itself, themselves, etc. So after having previously divorced myself from the mythic approach to God, I came back to God through Science. God and the Cosmos are one, and we are each a small piece of the über-consciousness that is God, or Allah, or Brahma, the Source, the Force, or Cosmic Over-mind, whatever your preference. Since this concept does not proceed from theology or religious dogma, it can not be termed a form of “monotheism”. This philosophy is not of a “theistic” nature. Consequently, it is not a Theological Universalist type belief, but rather a belief that reside under the category of “Cosmological Deism”, so perhaps it could be called “monodeism”.
The Quest Continues
After my catharsis, I embarked on a full-scale search throughout the faiths of the world. The quest is not for a specific belief system to embrace, but rather a search for kernels of truth, and points of commonality. For I have come to see that most all religions, all philosophies, all belief systems have those kernels of truth mixed together with the illusions and delusions of theology and dogma. The trick is figuring out how to sift those truths out from the falsehoods, to separate the wisdom from the mythology, the wheat from the chaff. It is a challenge, but a challenge most stimulating, and quite a worthwhile cause. I don’t expect to find all of the answers. If I did, that would be as foolish and as arrogant as those who think they’ve already found all of them. It would also lack humility. It’s not the achievement of the goal that matters nearly as much as the journey toward it. I will accomplish only as much as the duration of this life will allow, and that is enough. For me, the Quest is the thing. So the Quest continues.